The quest for 24 continues.
It is heartbreaking to watch her fight and come up short. It is also incredible to watch her fight when
she is down 5-1 to pull even at 5-5 in the second set. She could have shrugged her shoulders and
said it wasn’t her day but that just wouldn’t be like her. While I am happy for Bianca Andreescu getting
her first, I am equally sad for Serena.
Let me explain why because it may not be for the reasons most might
think…
Let’ start with what it is not about. It’s not because she needs to win any more trophies
to cement her legacy as the greatest ever, men or women, in my eyes. It’s not because I care about records
although it would be amazing to see her name next to a few more. To be absolutely clear, this has nothing to
do with her tennis legacy.
Then what is this all about?
It’s about coming back to work after having a child and feeling like you
must prove you are worthy. It’s about
showing the world that you can be successful as a working mother. Serena has been an inspiration for years, but
her goals speak more directly to me now.
When I had my daughter four years ago, I was slated to
return to work and finally get to architect a software solution. I had paid my dues working on inefficient and
wrong-for-the-solution software technologies.
It was all set up and approved. I
had everything ready so my eight weeks of maternity leave would coincide nicely
with the project schedule.
Upon my return, much to my surprise they had reassigned my
project. I would instead be “riding the
bench” for the foreseeable future. My
manager said to me “Go enjoy being a mother and your family.” When I finally got another project, I spent
the next two and a half years working on the same terrible technology that I
had before I left. During the same
period my counterparts got the good, interesting and challenging assignments.
When I was finally able to show a client my skills and my abilities,
my management team took the project over.
They were content to let me work on it while it was on the archaic
technology but as soon as I came up with a scalable, flexible solution and the
client wanted to expand the scope of work, it was gone again. I felt like it was an uphill battle that I
wasn’t destined to win.
I heard from people around me (colleagues, family, friends
and even strangers) things like:
“Get used to being nothing more than a mom for the next eighteen years”
“You’re a mother now, that should be your focus”
Why do people say those things? If I wanted to be a stay-at-home-mom, I would
have gone down that path. I have nothing
but respect for those that choose that path; it’s certainly not an easier one. Here’s the thing – it is a choice. My daughter is healthy, smart and well-adjusted
AND I have my career.
I finally quit a job I had been working for ten years. I took four months to work on building my own
company, learn new technology and generally get back to being a software
engineer. When I decided to go back to a
corporate job, I admit to being apprehensive.
I didn’t mention to anyone that I was a mother. I walked in and did my best in the two
interviews I took. Guess what – I immediately
received two offers. In fact, both
companies increased their initial offers because they felt like I was such a
strong candidate. I can’t imagine what
it feels like to win a Grand Slam trophy however I can tell you that it felt
amazing to be seen as a strong senior software engineering candidate. For the first time in four years, I felt like
I was a software engineer…that the twenty years I spent building my career was
finally paying off and being recognized.
Serena winning a Grand Slam trophy would show the world that
while she is a mama, she is also still a force in her career. She can be this amazing mother and
perform at her job. She inspires me to
keep pushing myself and reminds me it is more than okay to want that. Her loss today was not as disappointing as it
was heartbreaking. That being said, I believe
in my heart that she will break through.
Serena – this mama is cheering for you every swing of the
racket for as long as you step on a court.
You are my inspiration and I thank you!
